Time time time, see what's become of me

Hoy!

So I have to say, its a bit difficult for me to post right now. This is due to the fact that after going to the eye doctor Sunday, I've learned that my eyes are oval... to which my response was "No crap, I'm Asian". The doc was semi amused. But yeah.. turns out I need glasses so that I can ya know.. see, and not get these knife stabbing migraines I've been getting the past couple of weeks.

Ok so recap.

Saturday was a good day which is something you don't often hear me say this close to my birthday. But props to Haruka as she masterminded a surprise birthday party for me with friends of mine from all different 'groups'. We met up at a Thai restaurant where I had thought we were just meeting Digiblonde and her husband Bones for dinner and as we walked up to this huge table with all these people sitting there.. it took me a little time to figure out who they all were. Needless to say I was pleasantly surprised. Dinner was good but it was like being at a wedding where you have to bounce around from table to table to talk to all of your guests so you could not be rude. Sadly this caused me to only be able to have one slice of the cake of POWER that Haruka got for me. It was a big uhh three layer cake.. choco, vanilla, and cheesecake with strawberry in it. The outside had blue frosting which hahahah stained peoples' teeth and tongues making it look like an orgy of Smurfyness, and to top it off it was a Star Wars cake hahahaha with a Darth Vader voice changer on the top of it. I was sitting there after dinner and was wondering why some of my friends started humming 'The Imperial March'. Afterwards some of us took a looooong drive to a pool hall where I proceeded to KICK Haruka's ass.. yes.. but that's ok, she owns me in bowling nyah.

Thanks to everyone who came and contributed and was there in spirit (as they couldn't get their asses there).

- D -

------
The Bangles - Hazy Shade of Winter (partial)

Look around
Leaves are brown
And the sky
Is a hazy shade of winter

Hang on to your hopes my friend
That's an easy thing to say
But if your hopes should pass away
Simply pretend
That you can build them again

Look around
Grass is high
Fields are ripe
It's the springtime of my life

Seasons change with the scenery
Weaving time in a tapestry
Won't you stop and remember me

Look around
Leaves are brown
And the sky
It's a hazy shade of winter

Look around
Leaves are brown
There's a patch of snow on the ground

I can see clearly now the snow is gone

Actually that's a lie.. actually its two lies. The snow is not in fact, gone, and my sight.. that's going. Got an eye exam on Sunday, I'm not to thrilled about. I guess I really am getting old huh?

Lately either I haven't had enough sleep or my eyes are getting hella strained from being in front of a computer all day at work and reading alot more than I was a couple months ago. As of right now, my new best friend is this. Apparently it may have alot to do with it. Something called Computer Vision Syndrome. Awesome. I'll see what the doc thinks on Sunday.

Work has been killing me as well. If it weren't for ya know.. bills and having to be responsible... man I'd so move right now. I'm not even sure where. I'd move to just about anywhere.. Cali.. Japan.. Australia.. Thailand..no scratch that I wouldn't go to Thailand cept for vacation maybe. To many Thai people there that would give me shit for not being born there.

Busy weekend or not. I have to plan my weekends 1 to 2 weeks ahead of time right now. It gets on my nerves a bit. I like the option of.. doing nothing, followed by with some sitting still.. maybe followed by some tv and more nothing. Nothing of course, consists of sleeping and sitting still without having to exert much energy to do anything. A friend of mine wonders if I have SAD. I find all that depression stuff is a load of crap. I'm more of the school of thought that your mind can overcome anything and that you should just have to make yourself stronger and more immune to things that try to bring you down and hold you back. Course.. if that were the case alot of doctors / shrinks would be out of business I guess.

Meh.. whatever I need to go work for a few more hours before I can go home..

Lates.

- D -

PS. Check out Imogen Heap, she's pretty dope. Thanks to Darth MC for introducing me.

Also, thanks to Emy Lee for the letter, it's great you got a chance to play with markers hehe.

----

Imogen Heap - Hide and Seek (partial)

where are we? what the hell is going on?
the dust has only just began to fall
crop circles in the carpet, sinking, feeling
spin me around again and rub my eyes
this can't be happening
when busy streets a mess with people would stop to hold their heads heavy

hide and seek
trains and sewing machines?
all those years they were here first

oily marks appear on walls
where pleasue moments hung before
the takeover, the sweeping insensitivity of this
still alive

So you want to be a ninja?

Ohmigod.. this site is freaking hilarious!

http://askaninja.blogspot.com

Check out the Q&A videos buhahahhaha

- D -

I Blame Smallville

Recently, the TV show Smallville used this song in a very fitting scene... I think the only thing that would strike be as truly beautiful is the idea of having no credit card debt. DOH!

James Blunt - You're Beautiful

My life is brilliant.
My love is pure.
I saw an angel.
Of that I'm sure.
She smiled at me on the subway.
She was with another man.
But I won't lose no sleep on that,
'Cause I've got a plan.

You're beautiful. You're beautiful.
You're beautiful, it's true.
I saw you face in a crowded place,
And I don't know what to do,
'Cause I'll never be with you.

Yeah, she caught my eye,
As we walked on by.
She could see from my face that I was,
Fucking high,
And I don't think that I'll see her again,
But we shared a moment that will last till the end.

You're beautiful. You're beautiful.
You're beautiful, it's true.
I saw you face in a crowded place,
And I don't know what to do,
'Cause I'll never be with you.
You're beautiful. You're beautiful.
You're beautiful, it's true.
There must be an angel with a smile on her face,
When she thought up that I should be with you.
But it's time to face the truth,
I will never be with you.

Word

This is my horoscope for today.

The consequences of speaking your mind with blunt honesty haven't ever deterred you from telling the truth. So when someone from the past arrives and expects you to be nice, they'll be in for quite the surprise -- especially if the relationship ended because of something disreputable they deliberately did to you. Needless to say, keeping quiet, no matter what the consequences, may be even more difficult for you now. Don't even try. Let 'em have it!

Shiiiiiiiiit..... who's it gonna be? COME GET SOME!

After having slept like crap last night due to some wanna be Quentin Tarantino like nightmare, I'm good to let out some anger. Yes.

- D -

---

Young Jeezy - Soul Survivor

[Chorus]
If you lookin' for me I'll be on the block
With my thang cocked possibly sittin' on a drop now
Cause I'm a rida (Yeah)
I'm just a Soul Survivor (Yeah)

Cause er'body know the game don't stop
Tryin' to make it to the top for your ass get popped now
If you a rida (Yeah)
Or just a Soul Survivor (Yeah)

Freakin blogspot

I'm highly annoyed that the right side of my blog has suddenly gone stupid. I've checked the code in various html editors and it should work and the profile / archive / links etc should be displayed directly to the right of the top post but well like a gamer trying to dance without a DDR pad.. not so much.

Awesome.

12+ more days of being annoyed with life. Well... extra annoyed I mean. Though I did have a 3 year old sing to me yesterday, that was pretty cute. Yeah I said cute. Get over it.

- D -

Cuz mayyyyybeeee

Oasis - Wonderwall

Today is gonna be the day
That they're gonna throw it back to you
By now you should've somehow
Realized what you gotta do
I don't believe that anybody
Feels the way I do about you now

Backbeat the word was on the street
That the fire in your heart is out
I'm sure you've heard it all before
But you never really had a doubt
I don't believe that anybody feels
The way I do about you now

And all the roads we have to walk along are winding
And all the lights that lead us there are blinding
There are many things that I would
Like to say to you
I don't know how

Because maybe
You're gonna be the one who saves me?
And after all
You're my wonderwall

Today was gonna be the day
But they'll never throw it back to you
By now you should've somehow
Realized what you're not to do
I don't believe that anybody
Feels the way I do
About you now

And all the roads that lead to you were winding
And all the lights that light the way are blinding
There are many things that I would like to say to you
I don't know how

I said maybe
You're gonna be the one who saves me?
And after all
You're my wonderwall

I said maybe
You're gonna be the one who saves me?
And after an
You're my wonderwall

Said maybe
You're gonna be the one that saves me
You're gonna be the one that saves me
You're gonna be the one that saves me

Punk'd or Not

So the other day Haruka and I were at the grocery store and I was like.. Hey I'm gonna buy some steaks for dinner.. sounds good right? So I saunter, yes, saunter, over to the butcher and got some steaks.. he wraps them up and goes.. "That'll be $41.00". And I just kind of stand there for a moment blinking. Let me explain how this works for guys. There are two possible outcomes at that moment.

1) Say nevermind and walk away.. quickly.

2) Suck it up and pay for it.

So I couldn't punk out and go with option 1, so those were the tastiest steaks ever.. not really but that night they were.

So today.. I go to Dunkin Donuts cuz I figure.. hey I'll buy donuts and bagles for my team just cuz. I order a dozen donuts and a dozen bagels and the girl working there asks me.. how many cream cheeses you want? So here's me thinking they were the little ass individual onces.. so I say.. SIX. She kind of stares at me.. says four should be good. So I'm like fine four whatever. Turns out they were 4 TUBS of cream cheese. Ain't no one need that much cream cheese lemme tell you. So the guy at the cash register rings me up and says $27. Again, presented with the "not gonna get punked" moment. Good job credit card! Who knew that cream cheese was so freakin expensive.. guess thats what happens when you buy FOUR TUBS.. oops.

- D -

Faith

Damn.. I'm old. In less than a month I'll be a full year older than I was last Februrary. (yes I know). Just damn. Nothing up much lately. More work. More sleep. More not sleeping. Not as much gaming. Getting back into reading so that's good. I've also finally started using the DVD burner on my computer. It's kinda dope to download imports of movies and anime, burn em to dvd to watch em on my TV instead of on the PC.. I mean... I don't download stuff because that's wrong.

Something that's annoying to me is if you go to yahoo.com and run a search for "something more to life" it pulls up almost nothing except religious sites. Why is it that if you feel like you want something more out of life or you're looking for something that it's automatically assumed that you need faith and Jesus in your life? Am I against religion and sacarafice goats in my backyard? No, I don't have a backyard. But, I think there is more out there aside from religion being the answer. My view on some people and religion is that they worship blindly and are so devoted because they *need* something to believe in and for them, religion is it. To each his own, I'm not judging them and for all I know, they're the smart ones.

Lame. Back to work.
----

Poison - Something to Believe in

I drive by the homeless sleeping on a cold dark street
Like bodies in an open grave
Underneath the broken old neon sign
That used to read JESUS SAVES

A mile away live the rich folks
And I see how they're living it up
While the poor they eat from hand to mouth
The rich is drinkin' from a golden cup

And it just makes me wonder
Why so many lose, so few win

And give me something to believe in
If there's a Lord above
And give me something to believe in
Oh, Lord arise

You take the high road
And I'll take the low road

Sometimes I wish to God I didn't know now
The things I didn't know then

And give me something to believe in

No Post Today

That's the way - Shellshock
Hold on!It's never enough
It's never enough until your heart stops beating
The deeper you get, the sweeter the pain
Don't give up the game until your heart stops beating

You call me on the phone, you left me all alone
All I get from you is shellshock
Another day goes by and all I do is cry
All I get from you is shellshock
I'd tell the world and save my soul
But rain falls down and I feel cold
A cold that sleeps within my heart
It tears the earth and sun apart
But that's the way that I can win
A victim of your evil sin
You've lost the hold you've had on me
By causing the changes that you never see
Hold on! It's never enough
It's never enough until your heart stops beating
The deeper you get, the sweeter the pain
Don't give up the game until your heart stops beating

When we walk through open doorways,
Counting time in one or more ways
We can't find our peace of mind
And life becomes a life of crime
And that's the day I call your name
I came to you, I called in vain
You lost the faith within your heart
The fire in your soul from the end to the start
Hold on!It's never enough
It's never enough until your heart stops beating
The deeper you get, the sweeter the pain
Don't give up the game until your heart stops beating

I've been good and I've been bad
But common sense I've never had
No matter how I try and try,
I hide the truth behind a lie
But that's the way that I can win
A victim of your evil sin
You lost the faith within your heart
The fire in your soul from the end to the start
Hold on!It's never enough
It's never enough until your heart stops beating
The deeper you get, the sweeter the pain
Don't give up the game until your heart stops beating

Indigo Child

Read this article. Those of you who know about 'Indigo' may find this amusing. I know I do.

Told you I'm going to save the freaking world someday. Thanks to Joan for forwarding me the email from her mum.

http://www.nytimes.com/2006/01/12/fashion/thursdaystyles/12INDIGO.html?pagewanted=print

- D -

Work makes me numb

It's funny that my cubicle is in the back corner next to the window. The rest of the department is all in front of me. This is nice because then I can browse and do things like this without anyone looking at my screen and if people have questions they usually hit me up on chat or walk over to my desk. Just now a guy who I dubbed 'Dusty' (because he reminds me of an old looking Bubba Gump), walked over to ask me a question and in the back of my mind I was like.. That's right you best walk over here with your dumbass question than have me come to you!.
Work makes me angry and numb alot. I need a vacation, a real one, that doesn't suck, that won't make me die inside because it costs so much. Yes.
---
Song of the Moment

Linkin Park - Numb

I'm tired of being what you want me to be
Feeling so faithless lost under the surface
Don't know what you're expecting of me
Put under the pressure of walking in your shoes
(Caught in the undertow just caught in the undertow)
Every step that I take is another mistake to you
(Caught in the undertow just caught in the undertow)

[Chorus]
I've become so numb I can't feel you there
I've become so tired so much more aware
I'm becoming this all I want to do
Is be more like me and be less like you

Can't you see that you're smothering me
Holding too tightly afraid to lose control
Cause everything that you thought I would be
Has fallen apart right in front of you
(Caught in the undertow just caught in the undertow)
Every step that I take is another mistake to you
(Caught in the undertow just caught in the undertow)
And every second I waste is more than I can take

become so numb I can't feel you there
I've become so tired so much more aware
I'm becoming this all I want to do
Is be more like me and be less like you

And I know
I may end up failing too
But I know
You were just like me with someone disappointed in you

[Chorus]

No sleep fuels ADD

So I was up until um 5am or so playing Battlefield 2. I couldn't really sleep and was like whatever. At this point.. I'm like.. well, I could sleep for an hour or two before work, but then I'll wake up tired. When this happens, I normally just choose to stay awake and go to work while possibly having a nap when I get home (or during my lunch break if need be).

So moving on to ADD and things I don't want to admit. This morning while sitting on the couch after having not slept I flip through the channels and what's on? Power Rangers. Yes. Power Rangers. The Americanized version of a Japanese show (of course). Now I don't keep up on the franchise at all and whatever channel I was on was showing two different series of Power Rangers. This of course confused me because I'm like.. how many freaking series are there? So I get to work.. tired a bit.. eyes don't work to well and of course.. gotta look up stuff on wikipedia. Wikipedia is so great, I just feel bad that my eyes hurt trying to read all this crap it has on this show.

Do I like the show? Not really but I do have to admit.. laser guns, swords + girls doing martial arts in spandex isn't that bad. I think it's much like most Britney Spear's videos.. it's great, if you have it on mute.

Wow.. I'm gonna try to go wake up and stop looking up things that have absolutely no importance in life whatsoever.

On a sidenote this is an example of a thought that was in my head while I was driving into work today. I feel it's dervied from to many kung-fu flicks growing up.

"An individual's fists are weapons. A weapon can be used more than one way, so do not expect someone to punch in any one way, instead expect the unexpected and be prepared" If I had a gong noise to play after that, I so would.

Right back to work.

- D -

Freaking Nuts

A post about absolutely nothing.

So.. you can learn an important lesson(s) in life from a simple.. pistachio. It can be rather annoying to eat a pistachio as you have to open the shell to get to the inside. Sometimes, the shell is easily opened, sometimes it can take much more force and you may hurt your fingers and scream out FUCKING PISTACHIOS! Sometimes, if you get those red ones, they leave your fingers stained afterwards. The payoff? Yummy.

So. What have we learned from trying to eat a pistachio?

1. It takes effort to get something you want.
2. Sometimes getting what you want can leave you with marks (red pistachios)
3. There are alternatives to get what you want. (Pre "peeled" pistachios)
4. If you're hungry, don't waste time trying to eat a bag of pistachios.

Goals for the New Year?

Goals. Everyone needs them. Specially if you're playing soccer or hockey?

On the reals though.. what are some of the things I want to get done in 2006?

Well.. there's a big list. Sadly much of it depends on having enough financial backing to do so. Let's break it down.

Travel
1. Japan - Domo, Arrigato
2. Thailand - This would be rough as it would involve drama w/my father.
3. England - Dido lives there!

(There's always that getaway planned to Australia but pfft alot has to happen before that does.. G'Day Mate)

Social
1. I need to be better at keeping in touch with people. I've been letting stupid things like work and whatever else keep me from sending emails or picking up the phone. At the same time, some of those people are slackers since THE PHONE RINGS BOTH WAYS.

Work
1. I should try harder. I've been burnt out as of late but still my productivity has definitely slipped. (As is the case with me currently blogging instead of working)

Health
1. Yeah.. I should keep up with personal health. Between doctors and dentists.. I should go go go.
---

Okay, enough of that. Couple of quick notes. Don't go see the movie Bloodrayne. It sucks. It sucks ass. Sure you get to see what's her name from Terminator 3 in a compromising position.. actually it was only one position.. but still, that doesn't save the movie by a long shot.On the flipside haha Godzilla: Final Wars was awesome. It's like the Japanese Matrix, meets Power Rangers, meets Godzilla. If you're a fan of Godzilla its worth it. If you're not.. you'll probably think it sucks ass as well.

So the lyrics I end posts with.. sometimes its just the song that's playing at the time on my laptop, sometimes they have meaning and reasons for being posted. I gotta get back to work. None right now though.. not sure what mood I'm in right now..

Peace

- D -

I see trees of green red roses to

So it's officially the first work day of 2006... fuck that 2006 can keep it! Booo... Needless to say unlike some of the other people here I have not in fact "gotten back into the swing of things." That and I'm off tomorrow so whatever on all that.

I woke up this morning from a really deep sleep with some pretty lucid dreams. I can't recall exactly what they were about but I remember I felt like I was doing something more.. important with my life that actually held meaning. Then I woke up looked at the clock and was like.. ah damn it.

So Xmas and New Years came and went. Sometime this week.. the Hello Kitty meets the rave tree must come down.

Hope everyone had a good holiday.. now back to work bitches! It's funny, sometimes I have to think.. is there anyone that I know that reads this that I feel could get offended by what I write? Then I'm like.. pfft.. if it's anyone that *I* know that reads this they wouldnt be offended if I started making jokes about goats and different ethnic groups so I'm not to worried about it.

Watched a couple of movies over the past several days and standing out in my mind is The Butterfly Effect. Now, I know it stars pfft Ashton Kutcher and I know it has nothing to do with the book of the same title.. but the concept itself wedged itself in my head a little bit. If you haven't read the book or seen the movie.. well that sucks go do that. The basic concept though makes you think a bit. If you could go back in time and make any changes.. what would that effect? Would you be willing to change things which you feel would make other people better off but potentially effect everything else in your life? What if instead I didn't ditch that one event in high school for a girl I'm no longer with? What if I stuck with the whole going to college thing way back? What if's suck ass let me tell you. The problem with all of that is this. If anything were to change, if one thing that happened to me in my lifetime didn't happen.. that would possibly change the person I am today and my identify that I've established at least with my sense of self. So with that in mind, if anything could be changed... would that be good or bad? The thought that I could have been one of those guys that went to college and joined a fraternity..WHAT? pfft.

I think it boils down to me saying Fuck It.

Holla.

- D -

PS. Can you believe I still have some Xmas gifts to give out? Jeebus.

Nina Gordon - Tonight and the Rest of My Life (Partial)

Down to the earth
I fell with dripping wings
Heavy things won’t fly
And the sky might catch on fire
And burn the axis of the world that’s why
I prefer a sunless sky
To the glittering and stinging in my eyes

I feel so light
This is all I wanna feel tonight
I feel so light
Tonight and the rest of my life
Tonight and the rest of my life

Gleaming in the dark sea
I’m as light as air floating there breathlessly
When the dream dissolves
I open up my eyes
I realize that
Everything is shoreless sea
A weightlessness is passing over me

What Kind of Killer Are you?

First off... Happy Christmas.. Happy New Year.. and all that.

Yeah I know.. I've been busy.

I dunno. Taking care of cats and working?

Whatever. I know, I know.

Makes me want to move to the mountains and be a hobbit.

A hobbit? wtf? shhhh it's ok.

Results?

Amusingly on a good day I'm


You are a Samurai.
You are full of honour and value respect. You
are not really the stereotypical hero, but you
do fight for good. Just in your own way. For
you, it is most certainly okay to kill an evil
person, if it is for justice and peace. You
also don't belive in mourning all the time and
think that once you've hit a bad stage in life
you just have to get up again. It's pointless
to concentrate on emotional pain and better to
just get on with everything. You also are a
down to earth type of person and think before
you act. Impulsive people may annoy you
somewhat.

Main weapon: Sword
Quote: "Always do the right thing.
This will gratify some people and astonish the
rest" -Mark Twain
Facial expression: Small smile

But on a bad day...


You are an assassin.
That means you are a proffessional and do your
job without mixing any emotions in it. In your
life you have probably been hurt many times and
have gotten some mental scars. This results in
you being distant from people. Though many
think that you are evil, you are not. What you
really are is a person, trying to forget your
pain and past. You are the person who never
seems to care and that is why being an assassin
fits you good. Atleast, that's what people
think. Even if you don't care that much for
your victims, you still have the ability to
care and to generally feel. It is not lost,
just a little forgotten. In crowds you tend to
not get to noticed, and dress in black or other
discrete colours. You don't being in the
spotlight and wish people would just leave you
alone. But once you do get close to someone you
have a hard time letting go and get real down
if you loose him/her.

Main weapon: Sniper
Quote: "The walls we build around
us to keep out the sadness also keep out the
joy" -Jim Rohn
Facial expression: Narrowed eyes


What Type of Killer Are You? [cool pictures]
brought to you by Quizilla

Ved ikke hvordan

Ah yes.. Monday.. back to work, back to the grind, back to posting on my blog instead of actually doing work. I can't help it though I'm just not motivated to work right now. If people come hit me up on stuff.. sure, I'll respond. But damn that. I want to slack. I want to do nothing. I want to be a hermit, (or a hobbit depending on who you talk to), for a little bit. Meh.

The weekend was pretty good. I amost died.. hrmm and got injured a few times. So nothing new there. Some advice for people who don't know. If operating a jacuzzi and wanting to put 'bubbles' in it, be sure to have the jets on while you're adding the bubbles otherwise it'll be bubbles! bubbles everywhere!!! Awesome.

Gotta finish X-Mas tree stuff this week. This season of depression (Thanksgiving to a week after Valentines Day) hasn't been so bad I guess, but I still have some moments. Most of it being internal or in my head. All the crap you get from growing up in a broken home or a messed up family and all that, it's a lame excuse to use when asked why you don't like the holidays or why the make you sad and such. And it's a hard thing to place blame, but even harder to move on. If you think about it.. if you feel you're a good person or you're happy with the way you are then all the negative things that have happened to you only made you a better person. So what can you do other than accept lessons learned no matter how harsh they may have been and move on?

Aw hell.. they're replacing windows at work. I have a window seat. 18th floor. You'd think the assholes could have done this I dunno.. IN THE SPRING? ... I'm going to go do some work for now. Will post later I spose.

Holla

- D -

Pretty sure I posted these lyrics before.. but whatever it's my song on repeat of the day.

Sash! - Together Again

[Chorus]
I don't know where
I don't know how,
But I only know,
That one day,
We'll be together again

And I don't know where,
I don't know how,
But I only know,
That one day,
We'll be together again

It's been a long long time,
Since I left you all alone,
You need to know I had to go,
Far away from you.

I'll walk in this wasted land,
No one to take my hand,
Tell me why you came that way,
I don't know why.

[Chorus]

[Verse 2 (In Danish)]
Siden jeg gik fra dig,
Foles livet lang og hard,
Men jeg tror jeg kommer mig,
for tidlig jeg sa.

[Verse 2 (English Translation)]
Since I left you,
Life has felt long and hard,
But I think I will get better,
Because I saw early.

Jeg ved ikke hvor,
Ved ikke hvordan,
Men jeg haber kun at du en dag,
Vil v?re hos mig igen.

I don't know where,
Don't know how,
But I only hope that one day,
You will be with me again.
Nej, Jeg ved ikke hvor,
Ved ikke hvordan,
Men jeg haber kun at du en dag,
Vil v?re hos mig igen.

No, I don't know where,
Don't know how,
But I only hope that one day,
You will be with me again.

[Chorus]

Don't know where, don't know how,
But I only know,
That we'll be together again.

And I don't know where, (don't know where)
I don't know how, (don't know how)
But I only know,
We'll be together again.

Frozeded

First let me get something out of the way before the senseless rambling begins.

FUCK YOU WINTER!

Right now that we're clear.

I'm sad to report that Ninja Diva will not be joining us for Tallulah's show tonight. She will be with us in spirit though, and years from now when she's President or something, we will know that it was well worth it.

Hopefully this weekend will be good. Some R&R planned.

So last night driving home, people were lucky I didn't have a 10-pack of 'D' batteries. Windshields would have been broken. Now.. if someone is driving down the street and its snowing heavily..and you see obviously they are having trouble getting traction do you

A) Follow behind patiently
b) Turn onto another street
c) Feel bad and bake them a pie when you get home
d) Be a total jackass and honk your horn at them

If you picked d , email me your address so I can mail you a flaming pile of crap. Ok? Thanks. If however you picked c, I'll send you my address instead.

Meh. I'm tired not even going to get into everything else that's going on right now.

- D -

365 days later

"Zwan - Honestly"

I believe
I believe
I believe
I believe the love you talk about with me
is it true, do I care
honestly, you can try to wipe the memories aside
but it's you that you erase

'cause there's no place that I could be without you
it's too far to discard the life I once knew
honestly, all the weather storms are bringing
are just a picture of my dreams
'cause when I think of you as mine
and allow myself with time
to lead into the life we want
I feel loved, honestly
I feel loved, this honestly

I believe you mean the best that life can bring
I believe in it all
honestly, you can try
your heart is just as long as mine
is it ours to let go

'cause there's no place that I could be without you
it's too dark to discard the life I once knew
honestly, a single wrong is not enough
to cover up the pain in us
'cause when I think of you as mine
and allow myself with time
to lead into the life we want
I feel loved, honestly
I'll make a joke so you must laugh
I'll break your heart so you must ask
is this the way to get us back
I don't know, honestly
I don't know, this honestly

there's no place that I could be without you
honestly

there's no place that I could be without you
there's no place that I could gleam without you
there's no place that I could dream without you
there's no place that I could be without you
honestly